To the beleaguered husband who used those words as his search terms and wound up on my site, might I suggest other terms to use in your search to help your wife, or yourself it would seem, through what can amount to a very trying time. The possibilities are endless actually, as you might have guessed by living in the house with her. She could be moody, irritable, itchy (we all know that one), and can be suffering from insomnia, restlessness, fatigue and hot flashes. She probably feels like an alien in her own body. So go ahead and use any one of those words to search for help.
But let’s be clear here. You are hoping to ease your wife’s symptoms for her sake and not just yours, right? Because thinking of the woman in your life as a bitch is not going to help you at all!
Hopefully you realize you are both going through this now. Being understanding could be the best thing you could do for her. It would be nice if more men took the time to educate themselves about menopause and didn’t just think of it as something their partners are going through alone.
So though we women understand what the male point of view might be on all of this, as we’ve suffered for years knowing you think once a month it is your cross to bear when we have a period, I ask you to have patience and be supportive during this transitional time.
I know, I know, she’s short with you. She’s cranky and hot. Or cold. Or hot and cold…And she doesn’t want to have sex with you now, or maybe ever, or so you think. And maybe, if she has hives and intolerance like a lot of us here do, she wants to rip all her skin off or jump into a lake. She’s making you crazy with her mood swings and you’re tired of getting up to lower the thermostat to only have to get up minutes later to raise it. I know, it’s all been a big pain in your ass. But how do you think she feels about the whole thing?
And maybe, just maybe, as you age, and get cranky and fat and bald, your wife will still love you for your many positive attributes and not just search on the Internet landing, on eharmony to look for a newer model! Now I’m just being mean…
But I want you to really understand, bodies are complex. Yours too. And it’s no fun growing old when the body you’ve had for fifty years feels like it doesn’t belong to you anymore. So if you really want to help, stop thinking of her as a bitch, and start thinking of her as someone who needs a loving husband who understands that it’s not her choice to feel this way.
Maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on you. After all, there are probably men out there that don’t even care enough to search for help of any kind. But let’s just use better search terms and stop thinking of the wife as a bitch. Life will improve dramatically doing just that.